From Awkward to Amazing: How I Learned to Interview Relatives Without Feeling Weird

 When I first tried interviewing my relatives about our family history, I was nervous. Like, stomach-flipping, palms-sweaty nervous. I wasn’t sure how to start, what to ask, or whether they’d even take me seriously. It felt awkward. But over time, something surprising happened: I got better. And so did the stories.

This post is for anyone who wants to preserve family memories but doesn’t know how to start. Whether you’re a teen, an introvert, or just feeling out of your comfort zone, here’s what helped me turn awkward interviews into meaningful conversations.

Start Small and Casual

Don’t overthink it. You don’t need a full production. Start by asking something simple like, “What was school like for you?” or “Do you remember your grandparents?”

I started asking questions over dinner, during car rides, or while watching TV together. It felt less like an interview and more like a conversation — because that’s exactly what it should be.

Use Prompts That Spark Emotion

Facts are nice, but feelings are unforgettable.

Some of the best stories came when I asked:

• “What was the happiest day of your childhood?”
• “Did you ever get in trouble as a kid?”
• “Who in the family was the most mischievous?”

Emotion leads to detail. And detail leads to connection.

Record It (But Don’t Make It Weird)

I started with voice memos on my phone. I’d say, “Mind if I record this? I just want to remember it all later.” Most people said yes, especially when they realized how important it was to me.

If someone’s uncomfortable, respect that. But often, they end up forgetting the recorder is even on.

Let Silence Do Its Job

Silence feels awkward, but it’s actually golden.

After you ask a question, wait. Don’t rush to fill the space. People often need a second to pull a memory out of the fog.

Some of the deepest responses came after long pauses.

Make It About Them, Not Just the Past

One trick I learned? Let them guide the story. If they bring up something totally off-topic, go with it.

I once asked about my great-grandma’s wedding, and my aunt ended up talking about the homemade bread my great-grandma used to make every Sunday. It wasn’t what I planned, but it was perfect.

It Gets Easier

Like anything else, interviewing relatives takes practice. The more you do it, the more natural it feels. And the payoff? Invaluable.

Now, when I sit with a relative, I don’t feel weird or nervous. I feel honored. I’m the keeper of their stories — and one day, someone else will be grateful I asked.